Lately I've been pondering life changes and wrestling with difficult circumstances and understanding God's will. And though some things are still unclear, and fear keeps creeping in, I understand a bit better why our decision making gets so tangled.
1)
God's will doesn't always feel good. We're in deep with the world and its belief that we should only do what feels good. But, as Christians, we're still at war with our flesh, which means obedience brings resistance. It feels good to obey God when His plans line up with ours, but what about when His will means the surrendering of our hopes and dreams?
2)
Some of our friends will tempt us to take the road often traveled. This is the friend who cares more about comfort and ease than about sanctification. This is the friend who lives in "deserve" mode. Life is all about deserving a break, not about dying to self. She'll list your many sacrifices, as though sanctification is accomplished in 10 Easy Lessons instead of a lifetime of daily taking up one's cross.
3)
We equate obeying God's will with a "good outcome". After Paul is blinded on the road to Damascus, and Ananias is told to minister to him, God declares that He is going to share with Paul the things he will suffer in Christ's name.
The things he will suffer. He didn't say, "Paul has obeyed, and there will now be no hard days or challenges or pain." Obeying God does bring blessing, but it's not always the blessings we think of. Obedience doesn't always bring reconciliation or peace or more money or a bigger house or less difficult people in our lives. Sometimes the blessing is the gift of resting in the joy that you are honoring God and being made more like Christ even when everything around you is unpleasant or downright hard.
4)
Our hearts are deceitful. I've sometimes clearly known God's will about something, not because I had a vision in the night, but because I read His Word and cried out to Him in prayer, and yet, I still resist doing it. My heart whispers that I must be the exception and the surely God wouldn't want me to have to work so hard. My heart lists all the reasons I can't obey, when the truth is that I don't want to obey. Perhaps our struggle with
knowing is more of a struggle with
obeying.
5)
We leave no room for faith and trust. My life is one big Ebenezer of God's providing in the most unexpected ways. And yet, I'm still tempted to listen to the naysayers who plan everything out and have no time for faith and trust. They think they're simply being prudent, yet all of their plan-making is often a cover for not believing God will wisely direct their paths. How does our faith and trust increase if we never take that step into the unknown? Why do we cry out for daily bread, but put our confidence in the world's wisdom or our preparations or our bank account?
The good news is that God is faithful to give us wisdom when we cry out for it. We have His word right before us, and we have His ear. And though obedience might not bring joy and peace right away, the surrender eventually becomes sweet, and we're able to praise Him for keeping us from leaning on our own understanding.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." (Proverbs 3:5,6)
With love,
Trisha